Wednesday, January 15, 2014

ABSENCE DOES NOT MAKE THE HEART GROW FONDER

ABSENCE DOES NOT MAKE THE HEART GROW FONDER


The reason we are bound so tightly to members in our immediate family is largely due to the fact that we are “with” them.  When a child comes into the world, the helplessness of the newborn child requires proximity of the most intense kind.  The child’s literal lifeline is the mother.  The survival of the child, on every level of life is dependent on that binding. Children grow and learn in the nest of the family and are nurtured by one another. The world of the child expands as time passes and other relationships are introduced into their world.  Friends become a significant part of their social development and friends that they are continually with become bound to them, to some degree, but seem to fade in and out of their lives.  Family members remain the underlying constant throughout their life. When a child becomes of age to embark on the journey of discovery that will lead them eventually to marriage, the time spent with those involved in that discovery process will be the determining factor in ultimately being able to make the choice of who it is they will entrust their lives and future and the lives of their future children together.  Living closely together and spending time with one another is the secret to “hearts growing fonder.”  When loved ones need to leave, out of necessity, for short periods of time, it is necessary to take steps to regroup with significant time spent together and an increase of emotional energy to strengthen the relationships.  When someone leaves permanently, there is heartbreak. Friends who desire to remain close must make unusual efforts to keep those bonds tight by planning for frequency of reuniting because there is not built into that social organism the power to draw together that the family innately has within it.  Growing “fonder hearts” is the most beautiful form of gardening.  The family is the ultimate garden.


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